Isnin, 12 Disember 2011

here goes my sad story.

i was detected pregnant last month but yesterday the happiness is no longer was painful.bukan proses keguguran yang telalu pedih but the fact that i'm no longer carrying my little bean is painful.terlalu pedih.pahit.terlalu pahit.terlalu kecewa.banyak kali saya terbangun waktu malam dan mengharapkan apa yang berlaku adalah mimpi.but it's's real.the pain is real.sampai sekarang semua bagaikan mimpi.

saturday, 10/12/11 - 7pm.i started to get the pain on stomach.bleeding a bit.went to see Dr.Khartik (Pakar Sakit Puan @ Taman Perdana.very nice gynea) he did a scan and discover that the baby was not in a good condition.scan images shows a few cracks on the baby sack.that was when the painfulness started.explaination done.heart broken.i decided to let it go not because i didnt love him/'s because i love him/her too much.but hubby loves it even more he refuse to let him/her go.he wanted me to hold on.he needed a second opinion.and so we went back home and cried the whole night.

sunday, 11/12/11 - went to Klinik Nur and met Dr.Fadzilah for a second opinion.Dr.Fadzilah advised on the same thing.she said baby is too small for his/her age which was 7 heart heart shattered.all over the places.but i gotta stand tough.expained to my parents & hubby's that we wanted to let him/her major bleeding and went straight away to Putra Specialist Hospital.Dr Chew.a very nice gynea.explained everything thouroughly and we realized there's no other chance to keep it.let it go.i was injected with i-dont-know-what liquid.i think it's a bius.and slept the whole 3 hours.DnC done.while waiting for me to gain consciousness hubby buried our baby at mak's lawn.i woke up at 6pm.settle with the bill and went back straight's weird. i dont feel any pain in the stomach.segalanya hilang.dalam sekelip mata.yang tinggal hanya pedih di hati.

sampai sekarang semuanya bagai mimpi.pedih setiap kali terlihat susu anmum kat dapur.dugaan ni adalah yang paling perit sepanjang tahun ni.but i choose to stay on the positive matter how painful it is.i choose to smile.inshaAllah akan ada hikmah disebaliknya.

Hadapi Dengan Senyuman - Dewa

5 ulasan:

fara_poda berkata...

Ya Allah! Sabar yer scott... Insyaallah dia akan menanti ko di pintu syurga... Have a good rest...

miss shera berkata...

sorry to hear that.
jangan bersedih sangat ye.tak baik untuk kesihatan.
be stronger!

SalizaKadir berkata...

poda - inshaAllah :)
shera - hopefully this will make us stronger!

Tanpa Nama berkata...

Harap Scott & hubby tabah harungi dugaan.. Insya-Allah akan ade rezeki lagi akan datang.. Sesungguhnya Allah lebih mengetahui apa yang terbaik buat umatNya~

SalizaKadir berkata...

Tanpa Nama.siapakah?

anyways,maceh eh doakan kami begitu :)