bersyukurlah apa adanya

tak tahu kenapa lately aku selalu sangat mengeluh.almost everyday aku mengeluh.just like this morning,sampai je office,sit at my place,look at that tonnes of working papers and mengeluh.felt like OMG what am i doing stucking myself in here?honestly.yes.i'm getting bored of audit.looked at the space and cakap 'apa malang la diri ni' and as i was about to start working.aku teringat apa yang mak cakap semalam.

ayah fifi meninggal.

tak taula kamu-kamu ingat lagi tak dengan baby fifi.baby fifi yang ibunya merupakan one of my mom's bestfriend.she died last year after few months of giving birth to fifi.my mom was thinking of adopting fifi at that time.but kakak dia insist to take care of her youngest sister by her own.and the eldest sister was 13 on that time [this year 14] mereka 5 beradik.kehilangan ibu.and from that time onwards,dari apa yang aku dengar,kakak dia yang take care of the brothers and sister.pagi-pagi pergi skolah.tengahari balik rumah masak,basuh baju,bagi adik-adik makan.pada usia 14 tahun dia dah faham erti sebenar kehidupan.erti susahnya hidup ni.some of us keep on uttering 'life is hard' or 'life is complicated' without actually experiencing the hardship.

and now.selepas tak sampai setahun ibu meninggal.ayah mereka pulak meninggal.can you imagine the life of the sister?at the age of 14?aku hormat sikap bertanggungjawab si kakak.memang betul kata-kata 'bila kita rasa diri kita susah,sebenarnya ada orang yang jauh lebih susah'

ya Allah sungguh aku menyesal mengeluh tadi.terasa diri sangat ungrateful.

*tak boleh teruskan entry ni.mata dah berkaca-kaca.hati dah terasa berat*